False-Self

True Success

/ Tim Custis / Leave a comment

How do you define true success in your life? Many think that their accomplishments are the sign of a successful life. We are conditioned to believe that the job we have or the money we earn determines our level of success. We are taught to think that the size of our house or the number of possessions we have, signifies success.

Have you noticed that everything that I mentioned above can be taken away at any moment? If it were, would you still consider yourself a successful person or are you now a failure?

The idea that things define our level of success is all based on our conditioning and beliefs that we developed at a very young age, and that gets passed down from generation to generation. Then we carry these beliefs throughout our entire lives without ever exploring what might lie underneath the person we have become and our beliefs. We just assume that this is who we are and that we formed these beliefs out of our own free will.

When we put too much emphasis on what we have acquired or even accomplished, we can tie our identity to them, and when we find ourselves without them, we feel lost in life. We put so much energy into finding, getting or caring for these things, that we do not know who we are without them.

A successful person knows who they really are, their very essence and that allows them to be grounded in the present moment. This requires waking up to our conditioning through awareness and then releasing it.

The conditioned self is called the False-Self. It is the person you have become through your conditioning; an artificial persona that you created to protect yourself.

The True-Self is ever-present awareness, and from this state when something or someone is lost to you, you do not become a casualty of your experience. You are still able to embrace the gift of your life fully, and all that means. You realize that each experience in your life has something to offer you, and that is for your highest good. Even in those times when you do not like it, or it hurts.

Without a keener sense of awareness, you are destined to continue repeating your conditioned behaviors until you die. Without ever knowing true success in this life and what living life to the fullest feels like. You will be fooled by your False-Self into thinking that what you are experiencing now in your life is all it has to offer. This erroneous thinking will keep stuck in a repetitive loop, a sort of sleepwalking, and you will never be able to see true success or enjoy the experience of it.

The Key to Freedom

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“USE AWARENESS AND NOT YOUR THOUGHTS TO UNCOVER YOUR TRUE-SELF.”

Why, because the False-Self, which is the person you have become through conditioning will use your thoughts to keep you stuck in life. It often lies when telling you who you are. It will talk down to you making you feel less than or embellish the truth to make you think you are better than the next person.

It uses your thoughts to control you and keep you subservient. However, with awareness, you can expose this liar to the light of truth; once again connecting with who you really are, the True-Self.

When the False-Self is observed or brought into the light, it loses its covert and deceptive grasp on your life, and then you will experience the genuine freedom that is possible by releasing the authentic you back into the world.

Do not get upset just RESET

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Our biggest opposition to living this life fully is the person we have become, which is called the False-Self. When we bring awareness to the False-Self, we can let it go and reconnect with the True-Self. Once again connected with the True-Self we feel the presence of the Divine within.

If this is something you are drawn to, then you only need to begin by bringing awareness to your thoughts and beliefs, pay attention to your actions and question them.

Each time you forget, bring your attention back from wherever it has wondered and start again. This repetition will build a habit and begins to release the False-Self with ease and grace.

If it feels hard, it is because you are resisting in some way. Perhaps you beat yourself up for forgetting or you have latched onto a thought that says it is hard or that you cannot do it. If any thought does not support your intention, then the False-Self has taken over and you only need become aware of this unsupportive thought or belief. Now you have a warning sign for when the False-Self is in control. This is an opportunity, not a problem. There is no need to get upset, just reset and follow your True-Self out of the darkness and into the light.

The False-Self and Releasing It

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Feelings of judgment, anger, and hate come from the False-Self. When we act from the False-Self, it is because of a lack of awareness of our own thoughts and beliefs. Kindness, compassion, and empathy come from the True-Self, our natural state. Through awareness, we can awaken to the influence that the False-Self has in our lives. Once we do, eventually we are no longer reactive and can respond appropriately to the events that occur in our lives. Our actions and words stop being destructive and we begin building connection and community instead of fostering separation from any one person or group because they are different from us.

This is not some lofty ideal, but your natural state and can be experienced through developing greater awareness and questioning your current thoughts and beliefs.

In the beginning, you will be pulled away from noticing your thoughts by the False-Self. Each time you discover that you have been distracted, bring your attention back to your thoughts. Do not judge yourself for forgetting, this is a trick of the False-Self to regain its seat of power. Once you notice you have been distracted, bring your attention back to your thoughts. For some, this will be easy and for others, it will be challenging, however, if you stay steadfast in your intention to have the True-Self’s influence greater than the False-Self you will be successful. You cannot fail because you are reconnecting with your natural state, that of the True-Self.

 

Short and Sweet #166 – The Journey Back

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From the moment of conception, we are being influenced by our past lives and the present conditioning begins imprinting who we will be in the future. As we grow, this conditioning becomes anchored in while more input is received from the people in our lives and society in general.

Many search for their purpose by looking outside themselves, thinking that their true purpose is to do something special in this world. Although this can be a byproduct of the journey back, our true purpose is to hear the calling of spirit through the soul. This can happen at any point during one’s life. Some of us come in Continue reading →

Short and Sweet #164 – Change Your Outlook On Life

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There is only one thing that helps us to rise above conditions, and that is a change of outlook on life. This change is made possible by a change in attitude. I have found in my life that every single time I am able to change my attitude, my experience of life changes.

Too often, when our life feels stuck or uncomfortable, we think it cannot or will not change. However, this is NEVER true and in that moment, you have fallen victim to the Continue reading →

Short and Sweet #160 – YOU are the LIGHT of CREATION

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Within you is the light of creation and you should know that you are beautiful and perfect just the way you are. I understand that you may not feel this way now, but that does not mean it is not true. It certainly would not be the first that you have been mistaken in this life. This may be difficult to accept because you are identified with the False-Self and not the True-Self. Do not worry, this is a common experience at first for all of us. In fact, when things no longer make sense or you feel uncomfortable in your life you have reached a turning point. If you have not reached this point, do not worry because you would not be reading this now if you were not on the path. The intellectual mind cannot think you to this place, it is something that you have to experience and feel in your life. However, until you reach this point, it is helpful to believe in the possibility. Because you are the light of creation there is really nothing for you to figure out, you only need to let go of who you have become to remember who you are.

If I were a quarter, the head of the coin would be the False-Self. It identifies with mind, ego, thoughts and the material world. The tail of the coin represents the True-Self, it identifies with its direct connection to spirit and its foundation in love. A coin is neither the head nor the tail; in fact, most of the coin is the space between the two. We are like the coin, we have the ability in human form to live from the False-Self or the True-Self, many times we are bouncing back and forth, as we learn and grow. However, we are much more than the False-Self and the True-Self; we are part of the light of creation. We are not just part of creation; we are part of the creator as well. Everything is connected and works in synchronicity, but as long as we see the world through the eyes of the False-Self we will only see separation, this is the illusion. We fail to see the oneness is all things, the connection and the synchronicity.

Remember when things get tough, we always hold the perfection and light of the creative energy of the universe in us. We are held in the arms of creation like a mother holding her child. Creation only wants the best for us, so feel this truth within and not just your struggle. Do not ignore what is happening to you, but at the same time, do not put all of your attention there. This serves no purpose and only leads to suffering. Remember to put your attention on who you really are and know that the universe is conspiring in your favor. No matter what the False-Self sees, you are the light of creation.

 

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What’s on your mind? I am always open to questions and comments or for a healthy and supportive discussion about these topics.

 

Short and Sweet #155 – The Unknown Fear Holding You Back

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First, you must not try to eliminate fear from your life because it is impossible, besides fear is useful. Your life will be very small if there is no fear in it. Now I am not talking about the fear we have when we are in danger. The fear I am speaking of is about stretching and growing in our lives. Fear is part of the fabric of life and we must learn to use fear to fulfill our destiny and recognize that we need to move through it to create what we want. If you are not experiencing some fear in your life then you are not living fully. If we allow the fear of our fear to hold us back then we are held in a suspended state, not moving forward toward our potential or our purpose.

Many, if not all of us have a fear that resides just under the surface and out of our conscious awareness. We ignore this subtle feeling and it keeps us stuck where we are. Why have you not followed your dreams? Why have you not done what you once said you wanted to? Know that you still can, it is never too late. We will tell ourselves we cannot because of the family or I do not have the money or time, these are all excuses used by this underlying fear to keep us stuck. Yes, fear will give you plenty of reasons why you cannot follow your dreams.

If you want to break free then you must acknowledge the fear and then use its energy to help you create what you want. I am not telling you this will be easy but if you do not do it, one day you will wake up full of regret. You already feel there is something more that you need to do in this life. You know that you have more to give, but you just cannot seem to find a way to begin.

This is because you are allowing the False-Self to keep you stuck. Make up your mind this very moment to take the first step and each time you feel fear or have thoughts that tell you that you cannot do what you want use that and say, oh yes I can fear and you are not going to stop me this time. Do not let any thought or person tell you otherwise. Surround yourself with people who support you and let all the naysayers go. Life is short and you are here for a reason, you have a gift and if you do not use your gift then you will never feel fulfilled.

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What’s on your mind? I am always open to questions and comments or for a healthy and supportive discussion about these topics.

Short and Sweet #154 – The Body’s Rings of History

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I woke up very early Saturday morning contemplating the healing journey I have been on for over 27 years with my back. For some reason the growth rings in a tree popped into my mind. All of a sudden, it hit me how the study of tree rings compared to what I have learned on my healing journey. The big difference is that with the body you can unwind and release your history. It is not stored in your mind as you might think but in the matrix of connective tissue that makes up what we call the body. When you let go at this level, not only does the physical structure change but also we can transform on every level. Changes in our behavior, emotional state and how we experience the world can all be affected.

When you have personal experience as I have over my career working with so many clients you begin to see patterns in the physical form. The body’s structure begins to show you clues to how someone interacts with the world. Many other markers in the body show how a person experiences life.

Even more powerful than the release of the physical form is its truer nature of pure energy that exist in all of creation. We know that energy does not die, it is transformed and so too is your life when you release the history of your physical form. As we release the energy of the pattern it reshapes the physical form, which we would expect, however this is only the gross aspect of the transformation that takes place. Like the rings of the tree, our history is woven into the fabric of our body and it has contributed to who we have become. We think that who we have become is who we really are. However, that is as far from the truth as thinking that sun is not burning bright on a cloudy day. The release of these patterns allows the clouds to clear away and show the ever-burning sun behind them. This means that we have a way to release who we have become and reconnect with who we really are, which allows us to live more fully from the True-Self as we release the False-Self or who we have become.

 

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Short and Sweet #152 – Non-Dualism

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In the last two posts, I have written about the world of opposites and dualism. These relate to the dualistic mind and how it sees the world. Acquiring more knowledge around dualism will help you begin to navigate your daily life with more ease and grace. However, there is still a truer underlying state and that is non-dualism. The world of opposites is brought forth by the dualistic mind and it serves its purpose for the world we live in. However, only seeing the world this way causes suffering.

We judge things as right and wrong based on our filters and social conditioning. We see the world as black and white limiting our ability to compromise. Our political parties are perfect example of this now with their unbending stance and inability to compromise and make progress. If we are not aware that we see the world this way, then we have no way to escape the trap of the mind. We become defensive in our stance falling further into the embrace of the False-Self.

When we are present with what is, not allowing our conditioning to guide us, but our Soul, then we are embracing the way of the True-Self. This is where dualism and opposites fade away because they do not exist. This is where you enter the space between, where the underlying current is untroubled and unshakable. That is why the Soul knows no difficulties.

“… no matter what our difficulties may be, we recognize that there is a deep untroubled stream flowing below all surface troubles and that we are of one substance with that stream. The soul knows no difficulties.” – James Thornton

Stepping into this space is to know that you are one with all things and embrace who you really are a spiritual being having a human experience. All that you seek and want to know resides in this space. Therefore, the next time you feel uneasy remember this is not who you are this is only an expression of who you have become. You can let it go just as easily as you picked it up the choice is yours.

 

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What’s on your mind? I am always open to questions and comments or for a healthy and supportive discussion about these topics.