Moving Forward in Life

Many things in life keep us stuck and from moving forward in the way that we want. The unconscious resistance we experience is caused by a very long list of things that partially includes our thoughts, beliefs, perceptions, and feelings.

It is not a question whether you have resistance in your life or not, but how strongly it affects you. Becoming aware of your resistance is the first step, and that only happens through awareness and paying attention.

Here are four feelings that tell us something important about ourselves and show us that we are resisting life in some way. They are anger, boredom, hate, and frustration.

  • First, they say that we are not taking responsibility for what we are feeling.
  • Second, we are not paying attention to our own inner state.
  • Third, that we are placing blame on something or someone else. Therefore, the problem is out there.
  • Fourth, it shows that we are no longer in the present moment and not paying attention because we are lost in emotion and/or thought.

When we point to anyone or anything outside of ourselves, or when we try to explain something away, we are lost. The thoughts we have tell us that we are not responsible for what we are feeling. In those moments, we are not capable of seeing the truth, and we are no longer in the present moment because we are too busy placing blame elsewhere to try to make ourselves feel justified or better. There is a reason why I am feeling this way, so I do not need to look any further.

There is always a moment of clarity if we are paying attention that will offer us an opportunity.  If we seize the opportunity, we can recognize the problem resides in us and nowhere else. A simple way to know this is true is to see that someone else in the same situation will respond appropriately and without feeling out of balance.

Now, I know it is not an easy task, to pay attention during these situations, but anyone can do it if they want. Know that it may take repeated practice. However, if you have a clear intention to let go of who you have become the Universe will offer plenty of practice time, I promise. Moreover, with practice, one day you will surprise yourself with how far you have come. For most of us waking up is not an event but a journey. You must remain diligent.

How to Change the World

The next time you get frustrated, angry or upset with another person for his or her actions or words, remember that we are all doing the best we can in every moment; this is a fact.

Remembering this fact is not always easy to do because we will react to our thoughts, which are influenced by our conditioning. Past conditioning can cause our response to be inappropriate or disproportionate to what is happening. Our thoughts will tell us that it is the other person’s fault that we feel this way, but in truth, no one’s action or words alone have the power to upset us. We do that all on our own.

Think back to a time when your response to what someone did or said was inappropriate, or you overreacted. Also, notice if your reply was out of character or went against how you see yourself. Noticing this will allow you to see that there is more going on here than just what the other person did. You are witnessing your conditioning in action.

It was your thoughts and perceptions about the person’s words or actions, which evolved from your conditioning that generated your response. These misleading thoughts will make it difficult for you to respond appropriately until you let go of your conditioning.

You cannot think your way into reconnecting with your True-Self, you need to let go of who you have become for this to happen, to do that you have to become aware of your conditioning. How do you become aware of your conditioning? By paying more attention to your thoughts and the actions that arise out of those thoughts.

The next time a loved one, friend or co-worker is treating you in a way that makes you feel irritated, see if you can notice what you are thinking. In the beginning, you may not be able to hear your thoughts or notice your behavior until after the fact; know that this is okay. By paying more attention to your thoughts during or even after the event, you will begin to see your conditioning.

Know that every person who acts poorly towards you is suffering in some way. With this new understanding, release your suffering and conditioning, by being compassionate towards them. Use your personal experience to draw from; can you remember a time when you were angry or rude to someone? Don’t you wish that you had received compassion and love and not their displeasure with your behavior?

Remember the past is only a predictor of the future when we are not paying attention and then taking action from what we learn. Pay attention to your thoughts and actions. Release your conditioning and reconnect with your True-Self, this is our highest calling, because when we change from within the world outside us will also change.

Awareness

Stop, Pay Attention and Let Go

As long as you hold onto the thought(s) that is holding you back it does not matter what you do to change your behavior, you will always find another way of reverting back to that same behavior. The only way to stop the behavior is to let go of the thought and to do that, you must become aware of it.

How do you become aware of it? By gently by paying attention to your thoughts. This is not always easy because the very thoughts you are paying attention to will distract you from your intention. When this happens, you simply bring yourself back to the moment and start watching your thoughts again.

Finding Lasting Happiness

We live in a world where many bad things happen daily. Moreover, let us be honest, sometimes life just does not go our way. With so many things happening that we do not like, how can we be happy? First, you must ask yourself a question. Where do I look for my happiness? Honestly ask and answer this question before continuing on.

Many people think that getting the right job, having lots of money or being in the perfect relationship will finally make them happy. Only to find out later that you cannot buy something and find lasting happiness. You will not find it by taking a vacation. It will not suddenly show up because you fall in love or see the perfect sunset. Happiness is not something that needs to be found because it is already a part of you. This is why it cannot come from anything that can be taken away from you and no one can give it to you.

The only person who can take away your happiness is you and the only way to find it again is to begin exploring who you really are. No one can make you want to do this and only those who feel a strong calling will begin this exploration. However, to those that do, I can assure you that you will not regret the many gifts that come from such an exploration.

If you are reading this, you are ready or you have already started. Please explore my blog or ask for help with this exploration and know that you cannot fail or make a wrong turn. Remember in every failure is the seed of success and in every problem is the seed of opportunity.

Creating Opportunity

When we only see our problems as problems, we suffer. What I have noticed is when I begin looking at a problem as an opportunity my experience changes. The sooner I do this the less I suffer and the quicker I find my way out. To see how true this is, look back at your life and see what your problems have taught you about living life more fully.

If you cannot see this, then you are suffering now. You point to your unhappy situation to prove your feelings. This is the easy way out; it takes very little effort to feel victimized. Your thoughts are concentrated constantly on the negative, to the point where you cannot see anything else. From this place, you will not find your way out. However, there is hope from here if you are willing to make a different choice, right here and now.

To find your way out, you must bring awareness to the very thoughts that are keeping you trapped. Begin to notice how these thoughts only focus on the problem; notice how negative they are and unsupportive. Just the act of bringing awareness to these thoughts will begin to release your suffering.

Remember each time you notice that you have been distracted, bring your attention back to your thoughts. In the beginning, you will fall back into your negative thinking out of habit. Do not be hard on yourself when this happens; just gently bring your attention back to your thoughts. At the same time, begin looking for an opportunity to present itself, if you cannot see one, start by imagining one.

Things to remember:

  • Bring your awareness to your thoughts and just notice
  • Remember to come back to watching your thoughts when distracted
  • Keep your attention on the lookout for opportunities
  • Use your imagination
  • Whatever you do, do not give up
  • Be gentle with yourself when you slip into old habits

Be patient and persistent in your desire to live life more fully and opportunities will begin to show up. Even with a little effort, you can make a big difference in your life and this world.

 

We are like the Rose

When you look at a rose what do you see, are you looking at the entire rose? Where is your attention, only on the colorful petals? Part of the rose is its thorns, but how often do you look closely at them instead of the petals? Do you take in the whole plant or are you distracted by the colorful petals?

We are often distracted by what we perceive to be the colorful petals of others and do not see the whole person and yes we are like the rose in many ways. We have thorns, periods of flowering and times we are dormant in this life. Where we differ from the rose is that we often try to hide our thorns and do not want anyone to see them. This is because if they do, they may not like us or worse, not love us.

When our life is dormant, we can feel as though things will never blossom again. However, does the rose stop blooming because it has thorns or because winter came and went? Of course not, and our lives will bloom again if we stay true to who we are and do the best we can at each moment. It does not matter how many thorns we have because that is part of who we are in this life. Resisting our thorns, trying to hide them from others and ourselves only creates more pain. Embrace the entire you, because without the thorns you would not be you.