Thoughts

In Times of Uncertainty (Part 2)

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In yesterday’s post, part 1, I talked about how we can be upset emotionally and physically by what someone else does. I mentioned taking a different perspective on that person and their actions. Now I will share some steps to take to stay peaceful in times of uncertainty.

In order to get some clarity, we need to stop blaming the other person for how we feel, and then we have the opportunity to look at how our incessant thoughts contribute to our unbalance. Yes, their actions caused us to feel uncomfortable, but the emotional intensity and the effects on the body are unique to each one of us depending on our perceptions, beliefs and past experiences. Noticing that we have unique experiences in similar situations, shows that the person we are blaming does not cause us to continue suffering long after the incident, we do that on our own. Otherwise, everyone would experience his or her feelings in the same way and for the same length of time and we know this is not what happens.

This shows us how important it is to start looking at why we are reacting the way we are. This is done through awareness, attention, and self-inquiry. It gives us the opportunity to shift from a reactive state into having a response that does not throw us out of balance.

Begin to pay attention to your thoughts and question them. Are you aware of any beliefs that come up because of what this person has done? Here are some examples of questions. What is the belief? Does it still hold true? Is your response right for what the other person has done or does it feel out of proportion or out of control? If it is, you will be out of balance and may experience discomfort in your emotional state or body. Are your thoughts supportive of your well-being or are they causing agitation? Thoughts will not cause agitation unless we have attached to them or ruminate on them.

As you continue the process of paying attention and bringing awareness to your thoughts and beliefs, you will start to notice what is not serving you. Over time, you will be able to let them go. Often it only takes the awareness of the thought to let it go and other times you will have to repeat the process until it shifts for you.

This is important to remember, the very thoughts that are not serving you will distract you from your intention. Each time this happens, gently bring yourself back to paying attention. You will find this easier to do with practice and over time, it will be harder for your thoughts to distract you.

There are times when working with your thoughts may feel impossible. In these times, working with the body is a more grounded process. Please refer to Body Scanning part 1 and part 2. These two short posts will give you direction in the body scanning process.

Do the best you can and remember to be kind to yourself, this is not about perfection. No matter where you are in life, you can have more balance and peace, you only have to look for them. They lie behind your thoughts, in the innermost recesses of your own being. Finding them anywhere else will only be temporary.

 

 

In Times of Uncertainty (Part 1)

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It is easy to be upset by someone who is doing things that we do not agree with and many of us could probably name someone like that now. They make us feel out of balance emotionally, physically or both. For instance, emotionally we might worry, feel angry, frustrated or fearful. Physically we might get a headache, feel nauseous, become ill or even experience pain in the body. Each one of us experiences these imbalances in different ways. Have you ever noticed or thought about how you experience an imbalance in your life?

It is important to recognize that when this happens it is not what the other person is doing that causes us to be this way. It is how we are reacting to what that person is doing. Our reaction is formed from our experiences in the past and other factors that influence how we experience and operate in this life.

If we are not aware and awake to these feeling and sensations, we will feel like we do not have control over them. Please remember that being aware and awake to them is very different from just experiencing them or being absorbed in them. We all have the right to feel our feelings. However, being awake and aware of them means that you able to be with them, not overwhelmed or controlled by them. You must come to a higher understanding of what you are experiencing for this to happen.

A different perspective is to know that no matter what someone is doing, that person is doing the best that he or she can do in that moment. That does not mean that what they are doing is okay or right. It just means that they do not know any better. In life, when we know better, we do better.

Look at your own life. Most of us have done something that we regretted or that was wrong. Once we finally realized it, then we made every effort not to do it again. If someone is still doing terrible things it is because he or she cannot see or does not understand what they are doing is wrong. In their minds, it is perfectly OK and they feel they do not have a choice, even though others see it differently.

Part 2 will be posted tomorrow and is about learning how to stop reacting and how to start responding so that you can take proper action when needed and stay more peaceful in times of uncertainty.

 

 

Stop, Pay Attention and Let Go

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As long as you hold onto the thought(s) that is holding you back it does not matter what you do to change your behavior, you will always find another way of reverting back to that same behavior. The only way to stop the behavior is to let go of the thought and to do that, you must become aware of it.

How do you become aware of it? By gently by paying attention to your thoughts. This is not always easy because the very thoughts you are paying attention to will distract you from your intention. When this happens, you simply bring yourself back to the moment and start watching your thoughts again.

Real Freedom and Hope for a Better Future

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With an attentive nature to our thoughts and beliefs, we will begin to awaken to how others have influenced the direction and choices of our lives. Hope lies in the action we take. We do not feel hope when we let life pass us by; it does not come through resistance, only pain and suffering happen when we make these choices; life becomes dull and there is an inability to live life to its fullest.

How much of your life has been influenced by the conditioning of family, society and the people around you? You will never know unless you start being attentive to your thoughts and beliefs. Your freedom lies in the exploration of your inner world, it will never come by blaming anyone or anything out in the world.

The False-Self and Releasing It

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Feelings of judgment, anger, and hate come from the False-Self. When we act from the False-Self, it is because of a lack of awareness of our own thoughts and beliefs. Kindness, compassion, and empathy come from the True-Self, our natural state. Through awareness, we can awaken to the influence that the False-Self has in our lives. Once we do, eventually we are no longer reactive and can respond appropriately to the events that occur in our lives. Our actions and words stop being destructive and we begin building connection and community instead of fostering separation from any one person or group because they are different from us.

This is not some lofty ideal, but your natural state and can be experienced through developing greater awareness and questioning your current thoughts and beliefs.

In the beginning, you will be pulled away from noticing your thoughts by the False-Self. Each time you discover that you have been distracted, bring your attention back to your thoughts. Do not judge yourself for forgetting, this is a trick of the False-Self to regain its seat of power. Once you notice you have been distracted, bring your attention back to your thoughts. For some, this will be easy and for others, it will be challenging, however, if you stay steadfast in your intention to have the True-Self’s influence greater than the False-Self you will be successful. You cannot fail because you are reconnecting with your natural state, that of the True-Self.

 

Fixed Ideas

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We have fixed ideas about people. We see them through a singular lens and miss the totality of who they really are in this life. Remember the next time you have a particular negative thought about someone to ask yourself, have I had this thought more than once. It may even be about a group of people. For instance, a Muslim, LGBTQ person, a liberal, conservative, or anyone who believes differently than you, if you have, then maybe you have created a fixed idea about that person or group.

When we look at people in this way, it limits the world and our lives. Therefore, before you think a person is this or that way, maybe you should look to see if they are more than what you have allowed yourselves to see. Maybe you should get to know them, before judging them.

Has anyone ever looked at you this way and only seen what they wanted to see? Have you ever had that feeling? It could be a stranger or it might be a parent or friend. Maybe it was because of your job, religion, sexual orientation, your hair, a tattoo. It could be anything that causes someone to think they know who you are and helped them to create this fixed idea of you.

Have you ever assumed you know someone’s beliefs because of his or her political party or religion? Did you take the time to get to know them? Could someone know you just by your political party or religion? Could someone know you for years but not really see you completely? Have you ever felt this way, that you are more than just how people see you?

If you know that you are more than how other people see you, then is it possible that whoever you are looking at with disdain is also more. I can tell you that if you cannot find a way to see the “more” in people then your disdain will keep your life small, fill it with pain, fear and heartache.

There is one thing I can tell you for sure and that is that you are more and they are more. So consider your thoughts when they repeatedly play the same negative message about another person or group. Take the next step and get to know the person or someone from the group. Do not let someone else make up your mind for you, find out for yourself. You may find that you have more in common than your differences.

The Path to Peace

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Our suffering, hate and anger is birthed in thought, even war starts here. We must learn to let these thoughts go. Our fear of what might happen will never bring us peace. We must learn to drop into our hearts, why, because this is where our empathy lies. This is where love begins to flow and the suffering, anger and hate begins to dissolve. Too many of us spend our day in our heads, worrying about what might happen or thinking about what has already happened to us. If we continue to listen to these misleading thoughts, then we are destined to suffer individually and collectively.

You may think this is an impossible task. Do you want to follow that thoughts direction or the direction of your heart? If you want to follow that thought, then you are part of the problem. If you want to follow the path of the heart then you are part of the solution. It really is that simple. You have already picked one of these paths. Are you aware of which one you are choosing?

 

This Love, Loves Everyone

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Love, loves everyone; it is not conditional. We live in a world where terrible things happen, but this does not mean that we cannot forgive. If we do not open our hearts, we will continue to suffer. The world will not change by an election of new leaders, a million person march or protest. It requires the closed heart to open and to allow grace back into our lives. It requires the infinite amount of love within to be freed from the depths of our being.

Take a moment today to look out the window or if weather permits to go outside and just watch the birds. Allow the beauty of creation to come back into your life and let your worry and stress go. Leave your thoughts behind for just a minute to connect once again with nature. For it is here that you can awaken to what has always been with you. It is simple; it does not have to take a lifetime or lots of hard work. Just be willing to receive and allow this love to fill you up once again.

What Will We Create?

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Many of you are upset by the results of last night’s presidential election. Just as in my life, I know that no matter how this turns out it will be for our highest good. Worry, anger and upset only give the wrong message to the Universe. We must stay anchored in our heart energy, be open, and compassionate, which is our true nature.

Our Universe creates from the energy we send out and our thoughts are a big part of this creative energy. If you know this truth then follow it, because in this way you will suffer less and create more of what you want and less of what you do not want.

It does not matter how you voted, what kind of world do you want to live in? Focus on this and nothing else. No one knows how this will turn out; you only THINK you do. Therefore, your celebration of this election or your disdain is only an illusion of your false beliefs. They are not the truth. We will see the truth as it unfolds in front of us. In the meantime, you have a choice to make and that is how you want to feel in this moment. Choose wisely, because how you feel in this moment will lead to how you feel tomorrow and this determines the world we will create.

Is It Really Their Fault

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We are all doing the best we can in each moment; this is a fact. Therefore, the next time you get frustrated with another person for their actions or words, remember they are doing the best that they can, just like you.

This will not be easy to remember because you will be in the midst of your own conditioning and reacting to your thoughts and not responding appropriately. Not because of what they are doing, like your mind is telling you. It will say, it is their fault, but is it. Are you reacting to their actions or words or are you reacting to your own thoughts about them? You will not respond appropriately until you let go of your conditioning and wrong thinking. Remember you cannot think your way back to your True-Self, you only need to let go of who you have become to be your True-Self again.